We slipped past the two year mark in November of last year, and now folks want to know -- How much longer?? Some want to know because they anticipate us returning to their hemisphere, others because they are sad at the thought of us leaving their village, just when they have come to know us.
One group, SMUS, showed their appreciation this weekend by honoring us for our participation in the bicycle club. We now have a trophy (Pat's third french trophy if anyone is counting) with our names on it and their obvious appreciation for the little bit that we did (I think it was the slide show from the Alps trip that put them over the top - they showed it with three others at the annual dinner). We also celebrated with other friends we will forever cherish, wondering if we will celebrate in person with them next year, or will this have been our last new year's celebration in La Varenne?
We are entering a new stage for us in the long adventure of the ex-pate. I read a lot of articles before coming here, trying to understand the psychology of relocating, and the research discusses this very phenomenon. These articles noted that this ambiguity occurs in the third year and I have now seen several other ex-pate families go through these same emotions. After two years, we have established friends, a routine, have worked out the kinks, understand enough of the language, and are really enjoying the life, and it's just about this time that the ground begins to tremble slightly, warning of the the future earthquake because the company is talking about the next position.
There are questions like: "Will I take that back to the states with me?" And of course much harder questions like what will I want to do when I go back? And interesting observations, like from my dad who pointed out that I have actually spent more time with him now that I don't live there, than I did when I lived there. And from Mom who said I have grown into my own sense of style and confidence. Why? Because I make sure that when I go home I schedule time for the family, friends and activities that are important to me and it has become a lot clearer who that is and what those things are.
One thing has become very certain for me. I have chosen a great partner for this game of life. All else is secondary. My tools to combat the uncertainty? I laugh out loud when I feel like it, I cry when I am sad, and find enjoyment and opportunity where there is even just a shred, but I am always looking for it.
How much time do we have left to travel, schedule all the guests, plan for next year? As much time as we use. How do we keep the uncertainty from rattling our day, week, year? I am going to rely on "thoughts become things and take one day at a time." Two very different mantras that seem to keep me grounded, even in an earthquake.
